So after a week back in the good old American Heartland, I’m finally back in the Big Apple. However, after over 5 years of living in NYC, I almost miss the Midwest. I thought it was impossible, but no, it’s true. While, I still won’t ever want to live in Iowa again, I miss all the good stuff Iowa has to offer. Here is a list of Iowa’s good attributes:

1) People are Actually Genuinely Nice! Imagine that!
Yeah, so people in NY are mean, but people in the midwest are as nice as pie. They talk to people they don’t know, help shovel neighbors driveways, bake for neighbors, do random acts of kindness for strangers. In NY I’m lucky if I can get anyone to help me drag my heavy suitcase up the stairs. Today, nope, no one in NY helped! Bastards!

2) You don’t have to walk around in the cold or heat!
Yep, so in NY you have to wait for 1/2 hour in the blistering cold and heat for the dirty smelly subway, and walk all over before and after that. But in Iowa, you’re nice boyfriend/brother/father will start the car for you and warm it up or cool it off and so you just have to freeze from the house to the car, which is a few feet away. And people shop in malls, so no walking in the cold.

3) The economy isn’t all that bad in Iowa yet.
Actually, you can get the best perks for your job if you take a job in Iowa, because most people don’t want to work in Iowa, for obvious reasons (ie it’s booooooring). No one talked about the bad economy at all for the whole week I was home. Unlike in depressed economy sad land of NYC, where you can’t escape the topic.

4) People still have morals!
Yes, Iowa has it’s major drawbacks and people do tend to be a bit conservative and not so open minded (at least the older generations), but at least they have morals! The crime rate is low, so people in the country don’t even lock their doors! I know, crazy! Most people go to church, or at least believe in God and try to be good people. I’ve never seen any prostitutes in Iowa, unlike NYC, and no pimps either. There are probably only like 5 porn shops in the whole state, unlike dirty 8th ave in NYC.